Takoyaki

it has occured to me
that something might be very wrong with me.
and i should stop complaining.
just move on. try harder.
i must improve.

i, regretfully have become complacent,
thus,
my progress chart in studies has been to
rock bottom.
that is bad.(thats an understatement -.-)
god.
i think ive lost faith in myself.
i really want it back.
i need it.
i dont really know how to retrieve it back
numerous times i feel that people look down on me.
i want to change that impression,
but i simply dont know how to.

sometimes when certain people look at me
i can feel them wondering,
wondering bout what the hell is this girl gonna do when she's grown.

when i was small,
i always knew what i wanted.
i knew what to do, how to do it, and i will get it.
but now im not so sure anymore.
i know what i want.
but i dont know how to get it, when to start.

i know ive wasted three years.
thats a long time to play.
i confess that i have been a time waster.
and i am guilty of being that.

i try,
but its obvious im not trying hard enough

sometimes i feel like im a complete loser.

but i know i should just keep on trying
it is very unlikely of me to pour out what i really feel inside.
but i feel its about time i say it


i would like to share you a limmerick i find quite funny its from Matilda,

An epicure dining at Crewe
Found a rather large mouse in his stew
Cried the waiter, "dont shout!
And wave it about
or the rest might be wanting one too."